Happy Halloween!

It’s my second-favorite day of the year. Please be careful with your kids tonight. My best friend's sister's boyfriend's brother's girlfriend heard from this guy who knows this kid who's going with a girl who heard that illegal immigrants are passing out candy with fentanyl in it. And also, some sickos are putting razor blade in apples. And needles in bananas.

The Good Liars @TheGoodLiars

This woman thinks drug dealers are handing out fentanyl on Halloween. Why? Because Fox News told her.

2:28 PM ∙ Oct 6, 2022

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87,932Likes17,390Retweets

Be safe out there.

1. Shitposting as Political Discourse

Charlie delved into the Elon-Paul Pelosi story this morning, but what struck me about Musk’s Pelosi Truther tweet was the wording:

“There is a tiny possibility there might be more to this story than meets the eye.”

So. Many. Modifiers.

Who knows what Musk was actually saying! He didn’t say that Paul Pelosi was attacked by a crazed, gay Antifa socialist.

He merely pointed out that there was a mathematical chance of one event (“there is a tiny possibility”) in which there is another mathematical chance of a second event (“there might be”) in which exists some alternate explanation for the available set of facts.

Musk is so distanced from making an actual accusation that he’s barely even Just Asking Questions.

You know who else talks like this?

And:

“By the way, if she gets to pick—if she gets to pick her judges, nothing you can do folks. Although the Second Amendment people, maybe there is, I don’t know.”

—Trump, August 16, 2016

Some time ago Keri Mangis wrote a detailed explanation of Trump’s literary style, which breaks down the shitpost as a mode of communication. The key elements are the use of:

• Passive voice

• Metaphor instead of literal language

• Superlative modifiers

• Opt-out clauses (such as “maybe” or “I don’t know” or “some people say”)

Trump does them all. And Musk is now working the same corner.

If that’s not depressing enough, then how about this possibility: